Why I really don’t like the R word
Written on 11th Mar 2024 by Alex Lowery
If you don’t know what the R word is I’d recommend googling it and you’ll get your answer. I have come to notice that the R word is still fairly frequently used, not so much to refer to people with intellectual disabilities but rather just as a way to call something or someone stupid. The word was originally a medical term for people with Intellectual Disabilities but has become an insult and a slur over time.
Many people don’t seem to understand what’s offensive about using the R word but I personally think it is pretty offensive. The fact is: by using the R word as an insult: you are basically using a term for intellectually disabled people (I’m going to use ID for short from this point forward) in a derogatory way and in my opinion it’s pretty nasty. Now don’t get me wrong: I am NOT trying to imply that if you use the R word that you hate people with ID. I do honestly believe that when most people use the R word: actual people with ID are not even on their minds in the slightest, so I think it’s important to recognise that in most cases it’s not meant to be nasty towards that group. But with that said I still think because of what the word actually means it’s not a nice word to use as an insult. If you use it to call someone stupid then (whether it’s your intention or not) you’re kinda also saying people with ID are stupid too.
I have seen several defences used for why the R word is okay. I saw someone say that intellectually disabled people don’t understand what the R word means anyway and if they’re offended by it then it’s because they’ve been told to be offended by it. I personally disagree with this statement. Firstly: not all intellectually disabled people are functioning at the same level so there are some that will have enough understanding of what the word is or what it means. Secondly: even if they don’t understand it that doesn’t change the fact that the group is being disrespected and I’m sure their family members will be upset by hearing it. I have also even seen some autistic people say that they don’t mind the R word and think it’s okay for them to use it because they are autistic so if they’re not offended by it then others shouldn’t be either. This I completely disagree with. Autism is not the same as an intellectual disability. You can have both autism and ID but you can also have one without the other. So by this logic I don’t really think only having autism is an excuse to use it when it’s actually not the same disability. You have to have a low IQ to have an ID and there are autistic people with very high IQs.
I also think it’s worth noting that even if you know someone who is ID and is not offended by the R word: I personally wouldn’t say that means it’s okay to use the word as there are those that don’t like it as well. So these are my reasons why I don’t like the R word. Now by writing this article I am not trying to control your speech. Whether you use the R word or not is up to you and I will still admit that it’s worse in some contexts than others. However, I think it’s important to at least think about what the word means and why it is considered offensive by many people.
Check out the video below about the movie The Ringer. You will see a man with Down Syndrome called Eddie talk about why he is upset by hearing the R word. I think it’s good to hear the perspective from somebody with an ID themselves.
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What I lovely video and a good post. I personally would never use the R word and I have told people how bad it sound when heard by people with additional needs.