Having friends- circle of intimacy STARS part 2

Written on 14th Aug 2013 by Alex Lowery

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Something I learnt from the stars lesson this week was about friends. I said I didn’t have friends apart from those who had worked with me for years. Esther and my mum disagreed with me. They were shocked to find out I didn’t class people I had grown up with as friends.

Why did I think this?

I didn’t spend much time with them other than at organised meetings. When I did I didn’t have long conversations with them and there were other people who seemed to be much better friends with them than me. I wasn’t sure they would consider me as a friend. You can’t say just seeing people every week means they are a friend.

The STARS book divided friends into two groups.
The first group is close friends and the second group is casual friends. This has helped me to understand that I do have friends but they are in the casual friends bracket.

I find it hard to form close friendships because I find interaction difficult. I often can’t break into conversations especially if they are speaking about stuff I know nothing about. I feel really chuffed when I have managed a decent conversation with someone or when I am invited to someones birthday party. I always assume people would rather be with someone more cool than be with me.

If I need advice and someone to talk to I would speak to my parents or Annette or Donna who worked with me for many years.

I would like to improve my social skills but a lot of social interaction is a mystery to me. Next time I will write about keeping safe with strangers.

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