10 things about autism and me
Written on 6th Sep 2013 by Sylvia Lowery
Alex wrote this article for Flintshire Disability Forum magazine. he was asked to write something for those who had missed his speech back in July.
1. Autism is a lifelong condition, so it never goes away and it’s a spectrum condition, so just how severely affected by autism someone might be varies greatly. It can vary all the way from someone who’s non-verbal and completely in his or her own world, which may require 24-hour care, all the way up to a socially awkward mathematician at Oxford University. Even though there is a huge spectrum of autism, all individuals with it have difficulty in social interaction and communication.
2. Autism is a hidden disability, so you can’t usually tell that someone has it just by the way they look.
3. Most people think I act a little odd and they don’t understand why I act the way I do, but I act the way I do, because I have autism. I try to hide it by acting “normal”, but because I’m not like other people, there are times when my autism just comes out and I can’t really stop it. This is in the same way that an elephant can’t pretend to be a cat, and a wolf can’t pretend to be a grandmother. However, the difference is that the resemblance between these things isn’t very strong at all, while I don’t look too different from other people. I just behave very different so unless someone knows a lot about autism, they can’t usually tell that I’m on the autistic spectrum. They generally just think that I’m odd.
4. Socialising is harder than standing on a horse. Yes it’s true I stand on a horse every week but I struggle to break into conversations with my peers and often feel alone. I find that when I’m in a social group where everyone’s speaking to each other, I do often feel like I want to be a part of it, but somehow I can’t. I just find it extremely difficult to join in I’ll join in if I can, and if I have something necessary to say, but often by the time I’ve come with something to say, the conversation will have moved onto another subject.
5. I misunderstand language – When I was younger my Granddad jokingly said he wanted to chop our dog’s tail off because she would knock things with her wagging tail. I came in with a knife and had to be stopped from cutting her tail off. I wouldn’t do that now but I still sometimes take things literally.
6. I struggle with body language. Other people seem to automatically notice when people are using body language and know what’s being said through it. I’m always like ‘How on earth do they do that?’ How can you instantly know what someone’s saying by them moving their hands in certain positions? It’s like a complete mystery to me.
7. I have a hard time understanding someone else’s point of view. I tend to think that someone else will think about something in a similar way to the way I think. However, I think differently from others. One example of this is when someone asks a question like, “Do you like my hair?” Apparently you’re supposed to say, “It’s lovely!” Even if you think it’s a mess. I will always want to give an honest answer, because my feelings are if you’re not willing to accept the truth, then what’s the point in asking in the first place? So I do have a hard time with empathy.
9. I also have a hard time concentrating on things. My mind tends to wander a lot, and I can get distracted, especially on things that I have no interest in. I attend a horse care course and I find it hard to listen to the teacher and make notes. My mind is easily distracted and I struggle to keep up with what is said. I have a digital recorder now, which I use so I can listen in my own time.
10. I can only focus on one thing at a time. One thing that people without autism seem to be able to do is be able to focus on everything, and keep switching back from one thing do another. However, I find with me that almost all my attention will be in the one thing, and because I’m so focussed on the one particular thing, I may notice things about it that others missed, but I’ll miss things around me that others will notice like hazards.
Unless otherwise indicated, all materials on this page are © Alex Lowery Speaks About Autism. Please do not reproduce, modify or use for any purpose without the prior, written consent of the author. If you are interested in using an article on your blog or in your magazine, please contact us.
when ever I am with people who have autism I try to get them involved with the conversation. as you have said that you Alex find it difficult to keep up with the conversation so do the other people I know. good luck with your other talks.